…how I use your information…
I hate technical jargon and bullshit legal speak.
Like those terms and conditions statements that stretch to 40 pages and are full of words that have been specifically invented to cause confusion.
Or those privacy policies that need more deciphering than a Mexican on a tequila binge.
I’m a simple kind of guy.
I like partying, ogling, sunbathing, and snuggling with dolphins.
I don’t like anything that’s too complicated.
However, I can’t just bury my head in the sand (not without eight margaritas anyway).
By the way, plenty of references to bikinis and cocktails have been included.
So you don’t need to click on back just yet.
I Don’t Care About Your Personal Information and I Won’t be Sharing It
I don’t care where you’re from.
I don’t care about your name, email address, date of birth, marital status, or whether you make Facebook posts while taking a shit.
I’m not interested in your personal information.
On this website I only ask for personal information when it’s absolutely essential.
So if you sign up for the newsletter (which you should) then I’m going to need your email address.
I do need to know how your accessing the site, like through a phone, laptop, or tablet.
But that’s only so the clever robots behind the scenes can present the site in the most accessible way.
How they do it? I don’t know.
But I want the dimensions of the site to fit onto your screen.
It would be nice to know about your favorite cocktail.
Just so I can have one ready when you get here.
But I’m not going to ask for it.
If I asked about cocktails, then what next.
Bra size? Bikini color? That’s why I stick to the basic principles.
If I want to I can see the IP address of people who use the site.
But I only do this to keep the spammers away and ensure that some Russian Viagra merchant isn’t trying to sell his fake meds on here.
Like the owner of almost every website, I’m technically able to collect non-personal-identifying information about visitors to the site – like browser type, language preference, referring site, time of visit, etc.
However, I only use this to improve the website, and I won’t be sharing it.
I’m all about the confidentiality of your information.
I use the latest technology to keep the data safe and secure, and I’m certainly not going to be sharing it with anyone else.
I believe that sharing and selling personal information is like sharing your woman.
You just don’t do it.
Once you’ve got something, you make sure that everyone else gets their grubby hands off it.
Okay enough jokes.
Enough convoluted phrases that include bikinis, women, and cocktails.
- I don’t ask for your personal information unless it’s truly needed.
- I don’t share your personal information with anyone, unless it’s required to comply with the law or develop the site.
- I don’t store personal information, and I keep it off the servers so nobody can steal it.
- I have a newsletter than you can sign up for. If for some reason you don’t want to receive it anymore, there is a simple unsubscribe button that you can click at any time at the bottom of each email.
Subscribing and Unsubscribing From My Newsletter
I have a newsletter that you can subscribe to.
You get sent the updates from Playa Del Carmen, and I think it’s pretty cool.
I’ll need to know your email address for this.
If you have signed up for the newsletter (woohoo!), then I’ve made it incredibly simple for you to unsubscribe at any time.
So simple that you could do it after a bottle of tequila.
Just click on the unsubscribe button.
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If you’re a regular visitor to the site, you’ll know that my skills are in downing cocktails and ogling women – not deciphering legal jargon or the technical side to websites.
Talk to you soon!!!
Lots of love….